communication Archives

Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus is the name of a best selling book authored by John Gray back in 2012. It is a great communication guide for couples, with the focus on understanding how the other thinks and feels. Far from rocket science, but important in the evolution and success of relationships.

I learned long ago, early on in my 37+ year marriage, how to get my husband to do the things I need him to do to keep our household running smoothly. The solution was/is simple. Ask for help and tell your partner how you feel. Communicate what works for you as a couple. And what does not!

Many of us women were raised to believe we have to do everything (household chores) ourselves if we want things done properly. This may have worked early in the last century, but modern women are busier than ever and smarter than that. So are men.

In defence of the men in that generation, they were raised to believe similar rubbish. Chauvinism was rampant. My husband was one of them, so were my three brothers. My mother and mother-in-law were clones of June Cleaver, looking after their children and their homes while their husbands worked outside of the home. Things got more complicated, not to mention stressful, when both mothers went back to work as soon as their youngest child was in school. All of a sudden they each had two full time jobs. My sisters and I were recruited to help out, but the males of the family were exempt.

If I learned nothing else from that experience, it was that I would not accept that archaic mentality in a partner. Making that decision a reality was tricky, but we managed to figure it out. I used to slam cupboard doors and stomp around when I was angry and frustrated with his (perceived) inability to recognize necessary household chores.

I would like to say I straightened him out, but must admit he figured it out faster than I did. He did notice the slamming doors and stomping feet after all, so made the first step by admitting his need for me to communicate (verbally) exactly what I wanted him to do. This must be why “honey do lists” became so popular. He was quite happy to “help” although learned fast that he was merely pulling his weight rather than helping. This was especially important when our three sons were young and our household was very busy.

Our sons have all grown up and moved out, with two of them proud fathers themselves. That means our family of five has extended to a family of twelve. So when we entertain the gang, I am traditionally the cook and hubby is the cleaner upper before and afterwards. Works for me!

Men have (thankfully) evolved over the years, into caring and nurturing fathers, husbands and partners. And women have evolved by losing the martyr act and encouraging their men in these roles without losing any of their superhero powers.

Men are from Mars — The way to a woman’s heart is through a clean house

As the picture above indicates, successful foreplay doesn’t have to come in the form of candy, flowers or sweet nothings whispered in our ears. Unless of course that is what you need; everyone is different. Me, I believe actions speak louder than words and gifts. I feel participating in cooking, kitchen cleanup, bath time and bed time routines is far more effective.

The moral of this story? Men may still be from Mars and women from Venus, but we can successfully co-exist on Earth if we communicate!

How Does the Nervous System Work?

The nervous system-the brain, spinal cord, and nerves-connects every part of the body into one vast communication highway. The nerves communicate with each other via chemical and electrical messages. These messages are passed along between the brain, spinal cord, nerves, and the rest of the body to keep everything connected. Messages are coordinated and optimized on a cellular and a body level. This includes basic cell and organ function. It also includes higher-level brain function such as thinking, learning, and memory.

The health of our nervous system impacts the way our body functions. Factors that can affect nerve health include chronic inflammation, spinal misalignment, injury, and poor mental health.

Telephone Game

As a kid, did you ever play the game called “Telephone” where a bunch of kids sat in a circle with one whispering a message into their neighbour’s ear, who in turn passed the message onto the next person in the circle and so on? The last person to receive the message would then communicate what they heard- usually a version which did not in the least resemble the original message!

In summary, when the delicate communication highway in the nervous system is compromised, it can quickly turn into a game of telephone, with less amusing results. Messages become delayed, crossed, and totally misinterpreted, and the body falls into a state of dysfunction.